Saturday, March 27, 2010
ZephyrInTheSky.com
I’ve launched my newest (and hopefully final) blog at http://www.zephyrinthesky.com/. Please drop by there for updates.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Another Again
I really should update this blog now otherwise it'll be another million years before I get to write again. I'm meeting with Juris, Jhona, and Marie later at around 6pm, so I have quite some time before then to write. I'm writing this at the office. I sometimes come here on Sunday when I have nothing to do at home. At least in the office I get free internet access (illegally hehe), and I get free air conditioning.
I'll make this short. I'm seeing Vince again. We're not together again as a couple though. We're just hanging out. Most of my friends will be disappointed, if not pissed off, considering how much Vince hurt me and how much he made me cry. But I missed him. He's not the same guy who broke my heart. At least that's what I feel.
It started when I looked at his Friendster profile. I really just wanted to see how he was doing. I didn't find out much, other than that he posted on his profile that he was open to hookups. Friendster has this thing where you can see who viewed your profile, and he saw that I looked at his, and so he messaged me.
Hey, how are you doing he said. Happy Birthday. Sorry for everything I did to you. I hope you're happy and with someone who can love you in the way I couldn't. Please text me sometime. I hope we can be friends.
It took me a while to message him back. Not that I was still angry or anything, just because I don't check Friendster that often hehe. As soon as I got his number, I texted him. Hey, sorry for the late reply I said. Here's my number. By the way, it's not my birthday yet. You still don't remember what it is after all these years hehe.
And so we met again last week. We talked about stuff that happened to us since we were last together. Mostly he said he wanted to see me again because he wanted to apologize for everything he put me through. I said it's ok I understand why you did the things you did, and I forgave you a long time ago. I'm not angry anymore.
What I told him is true. While I still have a lot of questions I wanna ask him, like why he left me, why he didn't want to work it out, why he did the things he did, I kinda don't want to know the answers anymore. It's so over. And I forgave him already because to be quite honest after all the shit he put me through, any apology he gives isn't going to be enough. So no apologies needed. Everyone just needs to move on already.
We've hung out a lot since last week. We went shopping for home stuff, he redecorated my room, and spent an hour cleaning it. We've watched movies. And yes, we've fucked, and we plan to regularly. I'm sorry, but Vince is huge. You don't pass up on a huge cock, especially if you already know how yummy it is. Don't worry. I don't think I'll fall in love with him again. I know not to repeat the same mistakes I made before. He's a good friend, but a crappy boyfriend. We're better off the way we are now.
That's all for now. I'll try to post a new entry here at least weekly.
I'll make this short. I'm seeing Vince again. We're not together again as a couple though. We're just hanging out. Most of my friends will be disappointed, if not pissed off, considering how much Vince hurt me and how much he made me cry. But I missed him. He's not the same guy who broke my heart. At least that's what I feel.
It started when I looked at his Friendster profile. I really just wanted to see how he was doing. I didn't find out much, other than that he posted on his profile that he was open to hookups. Friendster has this thing where you can see who viewed your profile, and he saw that I looked at his, and so he messaged me.
Hey, how are you doing he said. Happy Birthday. Sorry for everything I did to you. I hope you're happy and with someone who can love you in the way I couldn't. Please text me sometime. I hope we can be friends.
It took me a while to message him back. Not that I was still angry or anything, just because I don't check Friendster that often hehe. As soon as I got his number, I texted him. Hey, sorry for the late reply I said. Here's my number. By the way, it's not my birthday yet. You still don't remember what it is after all these years hehe.
And so we met again last week. We talked about stuff that happened to us since we were last together. Mostly he said he wanted to see me again because he wanted to apologize for everything he put me through. I said it's ok I understand why you did the things you did, and I forgave you a long time ago. I'm not angry anymore.
What I told him is true. While I still have a lot of questions I wanna ask him, like why he left me, why he didn't want to work it out, why he did the things he did, I kinda don't want to know the answers anymore. It's so over. And I forgave him already because to be quite honest after all the shit he put me through, any apology he gives isn't going to be enough. So no apologies needed. Everyone just needs to move on already.
We've hung out a lot since last week. We went shopping for home stuff, he redecorated my room, and spent an hour cleaning it. We've watched movies. And yes, we've fucked, and we plan to regularly. I'm sorry, but Vince is huge. You don't pass up on a huge cock, especially if you already know how yummy it is. Don't worry. I don't think I'll fall in love with him again. I know not to repeat the same mistakes I made before. He's a good friend, but a crappy boyfriend. We're better off the way we are now.
That's all for now. I'll try to post a new entry here at least weekly.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
The Prodigal Blogger
I can't believe it's been more than a year since the last time I update this blog. So much has happened since that time. Here's a quick run through of the things I've been through since then:
1. Vince and I are no longer together. We separated after 2 1/2 years together.
2. I'm now the Training Manager for one of our Banking and Financial Services accounts.
3. I moved out of Pasig and finally have my own place in Makati near the office.
4. Lisa has started college at UST.
Well, items 2 to 4 happened within the last month. Lots of other stuff has happened since then too. Hopefully I'll be able to expound on all of this soon. I've luckily found a way to access Blogger at the office (shhh... hehe), so hopefully I'll be able to update my blog more often.
In the meantime, I want to add all the posts from my other blogs to this blog here. Since almost no one reads this blog anymore, I think it'll be OK to post even the controversial/sensitive stuff here. At least I hope it'll be OK. In any case, I'll probably only keep the really dirty stuff secret (hehe).
I'll write more later.
1. Vince and I are no longer together. We separated after 2 1/2 years together.
2. I'm now the Training Manager for one of our Banking and Financial Services accounts.
3. I moved out of Pasig and finally have my own place in Makati near the office.
4. Lisa has started college at UST.
Well, items 2 to 4 happened within the last month. Lots of other stuff has happened since then too. Hopefully I'll be able to expound on all of this soon. I've luckily found a way to access Blogger at the office (shhh... hehe), so hopefully I'll be able to update my blog more often.
In the meantime, I want to add all the posts from my other blogs to this blog here. Since almost no one reads this blog anymore, I think it'll be OK to post even the controversial/sensitive stuff here. At least I hope it'll be OK. In any case, I'll probably only keep the really dirty stuff secret (hehe).
I'll write more later.
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Sweet 16
Since Snipe, I've had one more man, my 16th fuck. As much as I'm itching to say who he is and describe him in detail, he threatened to kill me if anyone ever found out that we did it, and frankly I believe that he actually would. Don't get me wrong, he's really nice when he's nice, but there's a violent air about him that's both intoxicating and scary.
So let's just focus on the sex. Me and this guy have been flirting on and off for almost 2 years, and I never thought we'd actually ever have sex. But the last time we met, he felt my ass when we hugged, and grabbed my hand and put it on his cock to show me how hard he was. We didn't have sex right away, and it was a bit awkward cuz there was something else we needed to do before we could get busy, but hey we already waited 2 years so what was another 2 hours.
When we were done with the thing we needed to do, we went into his "office", so to speak, he turned off the lights, pushed me to the ground, and put his cock in my mouth. We stopped every now and then, cuz he wanted to find a nice spot in his "office" where we could be in a more comfortable position, but aside from the interruptions it was pretty smooth sailing. Like Snipe, he wasn't as big as some of the other men I've been with, but he was pretty big. We would've fucked, except that I didn't clean out before meeting him, cuz hello I didn't really think we'd have sex in the first place.
Remember the violent air I was talking about earlier? Well, he kinda showed that side of himself while I was sucking him. First of all, while I was sucking him, he kept grabbing my head and pushing himself deeper down my throat. Second, even when he started cumming, he would let up and actually grabbed my head harder so I couldn't push him out even though I was gagging a little. Lastly, when he was done cumming, he pushed me away, left me on my knees while he headed for the door, told me abruptly to wipe my mouth, and laughed when I said I still hadn't caught my breath and needed more time to recover.
I know that some people would find what he did offensive, but I love it when men do that kind of stuff to me. I love it when men treat me like a sex object. Hehe. He was worth the 2-year wait. Unfortunately we haven't done it again since then, but that's OK. We still text though.
So there. That's over and done with. On to the next fuck. I hope he's great too.
So let's just focus on the sex. Me and this guy have been flirting on and off for almost 2 years, and I never thought we'd actually ever have sex. But the last time we met, he felt my ass when we hugged, and grabbed my hand and put it on his cock to show me how hard he was. We didn't have sex right away, and it was a bit awkward cuz there was something else we needed to do before we could get busy, but hey we already waited 2 years so what was another 2 hours.
When we were done with the thing we needed to do, we went into his "office", so to speak, he turned off the lights, pushed me to the ground, and put his cock in my mouth. We stopped every now and then, cuz he wanted to find a nice spot in his "office" where we could be in a more comfortable position, but aside from the interruptions it was pretty smooth sailing. Like Snipe, he wasn't as big as some of the other men I've been with, but he was pretty big. We would've fucked, except that I didn't clean out before meeting him, cuz hello I didn't really think we'd have sex in the first place.
Remember the violent air I was talking about earlier? Well, he kinda showed that side of himself while I was sucking him. First of all, while I was sucking him, he kept grabbing my head and pushing himself deeper down my throat. Second, even when he started cumming, he would let up and actually grabbed my head harder so I couldn't push him out even though I was gagging a little. Lastly, when he was done cumming, he pushed me away, left me on my knees while he headed for the door, told me abruptly to wipe my mouth, and laughed when I said I still hadn't caught my breath and needed more time to recover.
I know that some people would find what he did offensive, but I love it when men do that kind of stuff to me. I love it when men treat me like a sex object. Hehe. He was worth the 2-year wait. Unfortunately we haven't done it again since then, but that's OK. We still text though.
So there. That's over and done with. On to the next fuck. I hope he's great too.
Fucking Satisfaction Survey
The last time I updated this blog, Vince was still my boyfriend. He isn't anymore. I could go on and on about why we broke up, but there's really no point in doing that. At least not here. I have other blogs where I can rant. This blog is about sex. Let's stick with the sex talk, and just say that for the last six months of our relationship, while I was busy trying not to cheat on him, Vince was getting busy with his new boyfriend. He's a two-timing asshole and I deserve better. Enough said.
When I'm single, I'm don't really like staying celibate for very long. So as soon as I found out that my asshole sex had been cheating on me, I did what I always do when I'm trying to forget a man -- I went online and started looking for a good fuck. Unfortunately for me, it seems that at 26 I'm a tad bit old for the general faggot public (dammit), so it took me a while to find someone. Eventually though I found Snipe. No, that's not his real name, but he didn't want to tell me what his real name was, and knowing his name wasn't really one of my priorities, so whatever.
It was Saturday night, very early Sunday morning when we met. He had just come from work, and said that my place was on the way home so we could meet then. I've never brought home a one-night stand, because I'm scared that the guy could turn out to be a thief, murderer, etc. But I was so desperate to get laid that I decided what the hell even if I get robbed at least I got fucked, and even if I got killed at least I didn't die celibate.
So he came over to my place, and luckily for me he was pretty harmless looking. In fact, he was a little too harmless. He looked like a geek. He was lanky and had glasses, but not ugly. In fact, when he finally took his glasses off, he actually looked kinda cute. We talked a little bit on the way to my place, and I was happy cuz his English was pretty good. Finally, I was going to be fucked by someone who could carry on a decent conversation in English. (Yes, I'm still bitter about Vince.)
Since my cousin Ogie was still at home (we share a room), we had to have sex downstairs in the living room. We had to do it pretty quickly, because Ogie's shift was about to start and he might have woken up and come downstairs at any minute, and also my other cousin Eric actually sleeps downstairs, and at any moment he might have come home. Normally not having sex for a long time would make it difficult for me to get fucked really quickly, but thank God Snipe was actually pretty good, so it didn't hurt as much as it might have with other guys.
My only complaint about Snipe is that he kept on asking too many questions while we were at it. Am I big, am I the best you've ever had, rate me on a scale from 1 to 10, do you want me to make this a 15 out of 10... Dude -- we've just started, you're still on top of and inside me, and you're distracting me with your questions. Do you really expect me to tell you the truth? That yeah you're pretty big and pretty OK, but I've had bigger and better? No. But of course in reality I said yeah you're big, you're the best, you're a 10, go ahead make this a 15. I'd say anything to get laid.
The first time was OK, minus the distracting questions, but it was really the second time that was awesome. Snipe and I met Monday afternoon at my place again, and this time we did it in my room because Ogie was out. That day I realized that, damn, Snipe really knows how to fuck. Usually getting fucked hurts me more than it makes me feel good, especially if the guy is big like Snipe. But there was something about his pacing and how he hit my prostrate, regardless of what position we were in, that made me lose all control.
So in retrospect, and to answer his questions, yeah, Snipe, you're big, you're not the best but definitely Top 3 (bested only by Gio and Vince), and you're a 9 out of 10 (8 for the first time, 10 for the second). Not bad for the first fuck since Vince and I broke up. Hopefully we'll see each other again, and we probably still will -- assuming he still doesn't mind two-timing his boyfriend. ;-)
When I'm single, I'm don't really like staying celibate for very long. So as soon as I found out that my asshole sex had been cheating on me, I did what I always do when I'm trying to forget a man -- I went online and started looking for a good fuck. Unfortunately for me, it seems that at 26 I'm a tad bit old for the general faggot public (dammit), so it took me a while to find someone. Eventually though I found Snipe. No, that's not his real name, but he didn't want to tell me what his real name was, and knowing his name wasn't really one of my priorities, so whatever.
It was Saturday night, very early Sunday morning when we met. He had just come from work, and said that my place was on the way home so we could meet then. I've never brought home a one-night stand, because I'm scared that the guy could turn out to be a thief, murderer, etc. But I was so desperate to get laid that I decided what the hell even if I get robbed at least I got fucked, and even if I got killed at least I didn't die celibate.
So he came over to my place, and luckily for me he was pretty harmless looking. In fact, he was a little too harmless. He looked like a geek. He was lanky and had glasses, but not ugly. In fact, when he finally took his glasses off, he actually looked kinda cute. We talked a little bit on the way to my place, and I was happy cuz his English was pretty good. Finally, I was going to be fucked by someone who could carry on a decent conversation in English. (Yes, I'm still bitter about Vince.)
Since my cousin Ogie was still at home (we share a room), we had to have sex downstairs in the living room. We had to do it pretty quickly, because Ogie's shift was about to start and he might have woken up and come downstairs at any minute, and also my other cousin Eric actually sleeps downstairs, and at any moment he might have come home. Normally not having sex for a long time would make it difficult for me to get fucked really quickly, but thank God Snipe was actually pretty good, so it didn't hurt as much as it might have with other guys.
My only complaint about Snipe is that he kept on asking too many questions while we were at it. Am I big, am I the best you've ever had, rate me on a scale from 1 to 10, do you want me to make this a 15 out of 10... Dude -- we've just started, you're still on top of and inside me, and you're distracting me with your questions. Do you really expect me to tell you the truth? That yeah you're pretty big and pretty OK, but I've had bigger and better? No. But of course in reality I said yeah you're big, you're the best, you're a 10, go ahead make this a 15. I'd say anything to get laid.
The first time was OK, minus the distracting questions, but it was really the second time that was awesome. Snipe and I met Monday afternoon at my place again, and this time we did it in my room because Ogie was out. That day I realized that, damn, Snipe really knows how to fuck. Usually getting fucked hurts me more than it makes me feel good, especially if the guy is big like Snipe. But there was something about his pacing and how he hit my prostrate, regardless of what position we were in, that made me lose all control.
So in retrospect, and to answer his questions, yeah, Snipe, you're big, you're not the best but definitely Top 3 (bested only by Gio and Vince), and you're a 9 out of 10 (8 for the first time, 10 for the second). Not bad for the first fuck since Vince and I broke up. Hopefully we'll see each other again, and we probably still will -- assuming he still doesn't mind two-timing his boyfriend. ;-)
Monday, December 10, 2007
Absolutely Fabulous
Last Saturday, the Fab 30s and 40s group from G4M had their Christmas party. As part of the event, their members, who wouldn't normally cross-dress, got into women's clothes and competed against each other in a sort-of Miss Gay pageant which they called Fab Diva of the Night. As the organizer of G4M's Next Top Model, they invited me to be one of their judges, and of course I accepted.
I had a blast! There were around 20 men who participated, and even as women they looked really gorgeous. Some others who weren't part of the competition still came in drag, and they were really pretty too. I was amazed because some of them even had their gowns tailor-made, and they mostly did their own make-up.
My co-judge was Mitoy, a film and ad producer (my type, but I guess I wasn't his, hehe), and we chose the Top 5. We chose Prince Dane who was in a Lord of the Rings fairy-inspired costume, Bulldozer who looked like Catherine Zeta Jones in an Oprah-esque gown, Chase who looked like Korea's representative at this year's Miss Universe, Sandstorm who looked like he had been doing drag for a while, and Leoshine who was in a Dreamgirls-inspired gown with an Afro. After a non-serious Q&A, Leoshine won.
After the competition, most of the contestants got out of costume and put on guys clothes again. Some of them still looked gorgeous. I also got a chance to finally meet and chat with someone of the people from G4M-NTM who I hadn't met previously. One of the models from G4M-NTM Cycle 3, _uno_, had a dance number, which he did in drag, and he was really good. I also met Ellis and SayNo, co-judges, and mycomic, one of the Cycle 3's Top 4. I swear, mycomic looks so much like Rica Peralejo in person.
After the party, I went straight to Malate. It was a slow night. Didn't get much action, except for this one semi-cute guy who kept rubbing my butt with his. I would've asked him what his name was, but I didn't bother cuz he wasn't all that. Plus since he was rubbing my butt with his butt, so he was probably a bottom anyway. If he were a top, he would've turned around after a few minutes and started dry humping me. So it wasn't worth the effort.
That's all.
I had a blast! There were around 20 men who participated, and even as women they looked really gorgeous. Some others who weren't part of the competition still came in drag, and they were really pretty too. I was amazed because some of them even had their gowns tailor-made, and they mostly did their own make-up.
My co-judge was Mitoy, a film and ad producer (my type, but I guess I wasn't his, hehe), and we chose the Top 5. We chose Prince Dane who was in a Lord of the Rings fairy-inspired costume, Bulldozer who looked like Catherine Zeta Jones in an Oprah-esque gown, Chase who looked like Korea's representative at this year's Miss Universe, Sandstorm who looked like he had been doing drag for a while, and Leoshine who was in a Dreamgirls-inspired gown with an Afro. After a non-serious Q&A, Leoshine won.
After the competition, most of the contestants got out of costume and put on guys clothes again. Some of them still looked gorgeous. I also got a chance to finally meet and chat with someone of the people from G4M-NTM who I hadn't met previously. One of the models from G4M-NTM Cycle 3, _uno_, had a dance number, which he did in drag, and he was really good. I also met Ellis and SayNo, co-judges, and mycomic, one of the Cycle 3's Top 4. I swear, mycomic looks so much like Rica Peralejo in person.
After the party, I went straight to Malate. It was a slow night. Didn't get much action, except for this one semi-cute guy who kept rubbing my butt with his. I would've asked him what his name was, but I didn't bother cuz he wasn't all that. Plus since he was rubbing my butt with his butt, so he was probably a bottom anyway. If he were a top, he would've turned around after a few minutes and started dry humping me. So it wasn't worth the effort.
That's all.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
I Heard Love Is Blind
Oh my God I've found the perfect song that describes the way that I'm feeling. My last entry was all about how I've decided that cheating on Vince wouldn't be so bad after all, and today I heard Amy Winehouse's song "I Heard Love Is Blind" for the very first time. It's about this woman who cheats on her man and she justifies it by saying it wasn't really cheating because she was thinking about him while she was fucking the other guy. I can relate because everytime I think about having sex with someone else (like last Saturday with Deo), I end up comparing the guy I'm fantasizing about to Vince. Either that or I end up wishing it was Vince who was fucking me instead. As the song says, I'm sure Vince wouldn't want me to be lonely... but I know he'd be pissed off if he found out it was someone else fucking me and not him.
I couldn't resist him
His eyes were like yours
His hair was exactly the shade of brown
He's just not as tall, but I couldn't tell
It was dark and I was lying down
You are everything – he means nothing to me
I can't even remember his name
Why're you so upset?
Baby, you weren't there and I was thinking of you when I came
What do you expect?
You left me here alone; I drank so much and needed to touch
Don't overreact – I pretended he was you
You wouldn't want me to be lonely
How can I put it so you understand?
I didn't let him hold my hand
But he looked like you; I guess he looked like you
No he wasn't you
But you can still trust me, this ain't infidelity
It's not cheating; you were on my mind
Yes he looked like you
But I heard love is blind...
I'd honestly rather not cheat on him. I still think that cheating in general is wrong. Just maybe not with him.
I couldn't resist him
His eyes were like yours
His hair was exactly the shade of brown
He's just not as tall, but I couldn't tell
It was dark and I was lying down
You are everything – he means nothing to me
I can't even remember his name
Why're you so upset?
Baby, you weren't there and I was thinking of you when I came
What do you expect?
You left me here alone; I drank so much and needed to touch
Don't overreact – I pretended he was you
You wouldn't want me to be lonely
How can I put it so you understand?
I didn't let him hold my hand
But he looked like you; I guess he looked like you
No he wasn't you
But you can still trust me, this ain't infidelity
It's not cheating; you were on my mind
Yes he looked like you
But I heard love is blind...
I'd honestly rather not cheat on him. I still think that cheating in general is wrong. Just maybe not with him.
Sexual Rebirth
My sex life has been relatively quiet (if not silent) in the past few months, and that's why I haven't been able to update this blog as often as I would have liked. Last week though, things started picking up again, and so I'm back. Hopefully the momentum won't die down.
First of all, before anything else, Vince and I don't go out anymore. The last time I had sex was in April, and the last time we had sex together was in February. In February the sex wasn't even all that, and the last time I enjoyed having sex with Vince was early last year. These past few months, it's always me who seems to be asking for sex first. Needless to say, my sex life has been shit, and Romi's been pissing me off about it. That's all about to change soon though, with or without Vince. I have never cheated on him, but since he doesn't seem to be interested in having sex with me anymore, then screw fidelity.
I went online on MIRC last Wednesday for the first time in months and I met a guy named Sean. He looked semi-hot, and lucky for me apparently he didn't think I was that bad either. He wanted to meet right away, and I just got off work so I was like hey if you want to meet now I still have to go home and clean up but if you want we can just exchange numbers and meet another time. He said fine let's just meet this weekend and by the way would it be ok if my friend joined us. I said yeah sure but I have to tell you I'm pure bottom so that limits us a bit would that be ok. He said yeah it's not a problem. And so we set a date for Saturday evening.
Saturday afternoon. Sean texts and asks if I'm free early evening. I said sure, and then I went out of the house to prepare. I got a haircut and bought some nice clothes and new shoes. When I got home I took a bath, douched, etc. In the evening, Sean still hadn't texted, but it wasn't a big deal cuz I was planning to go to Malate anyway, so if Sean and his friend had already found someone else then what the hell I was going to find someone too.
Later that night I was on my way to Malate, and when I rode a jeep on Taft there was a cute guy next to me. He seemed to be busy, so I spent most of the ride flirting with the guy opposite me -- who wasn't all that hot but what the fuck I was horny and not very choosy. The cute guy got off the jeep at Remedios, a street before Nakpil which is where I was going to get off, so I though what the hell I'll get off too and if we end up walking in the same direction then great something might happen. But no. He went in the other direction so whatever I went on my way to Nakpil.
Just before I got to Nakpil, someone grabbed my arm. I didn't think anything of it, and at first I thought it was Tom (my friend and co-organizer of G4M's Next Top Model), cuz only someone you know would grab your arm right. But no. I was being mugged. Soon the guy had his left hand over my mouth and his right hand had a knife which he was holding close to my chest. He asked for my phone and I gave it right away cuz hell I never really liked that phone anyway. He also asked for my cash, and I gave him the 40 pesos that was in my left pocket. Of course I had way more than that, but the rest of my money was in my socks and he didn't press the issue cuz I guess he saw how crap my phone was and assumed I really was poor. After I gave him the cash he let go of me and told me to run. And I did.
I probably should have been more traumatized than I was, and I have to admit that in the moment the knife and his voice freaked me out a bit, but a few minutes after he let go of me my first reaction was to smirk and laugh a bit. Like I said, my phone was crap and he just gave me an excuse to buy a new one. All he got was 40 pesos, and he didn't even ask for more. In way, he didn't really get much from me, and except for the scratch from where the knife pressed into my chest, I escaped with very little being taken from me. I was lucky. And I wasn't going to let that small hiccup ruin what was going to be a fabulous night.
So when I got to Malate I looked for Tom and my other G4M-NTM friends. I couldn't see where they were right away, so I ordered a beer and stayed outside Chelu for a bit. When I went back inside I finally saw Mother Domeng, KC and Chris and hung out with them for a while. Domeng and I are similar in the sense that we go to Malate not really to pick men up, but really more than anything to dance. If men pick us up then fine, but if not so what cuz all we really wanted to do was dance anyway.
Of course, having said that, dancing in a bar in Malate means that inevitably you'll be rubbing body parts with hot strangers, and that's what happened to me. I was just minding my own business, dancing like I was the only one there on the floor, when in comes in this hot manly man with huge muscles a tight tshirt and an i'm-tired-i-just-wanna-go-home-and-fuck-some-pretty-young-thing look on his face. He stood at the bar right next to where I was. At first we were both looking in other directions, pretending not to see each other checking each other out. Then it became more difficult to ignore each other because there were more people going into the bar than there were going out, and in no time the crowd was pressing us into each other.
At first I was still like ok whatever you're hot but I'm here to dance so even if we were touching already I was still dancing and grooving to the music. But then he looked me in the eye, smiled, and scratched my tummy. Of course I smiled back. I moved next to him and we held hands. I swear, even at the first touch I was already feeling really loose and limp cuz he was so fucking hot. His hands were warm, a little rough, and huge. I asked him what his name was. He said it was Deo. I said hi I'm Josef. I can't remember what we talked about after, but I do remember that I started dancing again, and while I was dancing he started massaging my lower back with his fingers. I swear, if he wanted me right then and there I was going to give in. But for whatever reason a few minutes later he left the bar and didn't come back.
OK fine. Call me slow. Even though I kinda knew that that was my signal to leave the bar with him so we could fuck the night away in some god-forsaken motel, he never explicitly said he wanted me to go with him, and I didn't want to assume anything. Also, I was with Domeng, and I didn't want to leave him abruptly. So I stayed in the bar and danced, which is what I was having fun doing anyway. Naturally I spent the rest of the night thinking what the fuck I'm such an idiot I should have just left with him and gotten laid. I saw him outside the bar a few hours later but it seemed he had already picked someone else up. Fuck.
Oh well. The rest of the night I was so high on his touch, the lights, the music, and the cigarette smoke that my head was feeling really light. I still had a great time though. I hope Deo is still around when I get back to Malate this Saturday. If not him then some other hot man.
So that was it for Saturday. The only other thing I did was meet up with some people from G4M's Next Top Model, but the meeting didn't last long. Plus I'm not part of G4M-NTM anymore, though that's an entirely different story. On Sunday I bought a new phone, set a new date with Sean, and masturbated to the memory of Deo's touch.
Until next time.
First of all, before anything else, Vince and I don't go out anymore. The last time I had sex was in April, and the last time we had sex together was in February. In February the sex wasn't even all that, and the last time I enjoyed having sex with Vince was early last year. These past few months, it's always me who seems to be asking for sex first. Needless to say, my sex life has been shit, and Romi's been pissing me off about it. That's all about to change soon though, with or without Vince. I have never cheated on him, but since he doesn't seem to be interested in having sex with me anymore, then screw fidelity.
I went online on MIRC last Wednesday for the first time in months and I met a guy named Sean. He looked semi-hot, and lucky for me apparently he didn't think I was that bad either. He wanted to meet right away, and I just got off work so I was like hey if you want to meet now I still have to go home and clean up but if you want we can just exchange numbers and meet another time. He said fine let's just meet this weekend and by the way would it be ok if my friend joined us. I said yeah sure but I have to tell you I'm pure bottom so that limits us a bit would that be ok. He said yeah it's not a problem. And so we set a date for Saturday evening.
Saturday afternoon. Sean texts and asks if I'm free early evening. I said sure, and then I went out of the house to prepare. I got a haircut and bought some nice clothes and new shoes. When I got home I took a bath, douched, etc. In the evening, Sean still hadn't texted, but it wasn't a big deal cuz I was planning to go to Malate anyway, so if Sean and his friend had already found someone else then what the hell I was going to find someone too.
Later that night I was on my way to Malate, and when I rode a jeep on Taft there was a cute guy next to me. He seemed to be busy, so I spent most of the ride flirting with the guy opposite me -- who wasn't all that hot but what the fuck I was horny and not very choosy. The cute guy got off the jeep at Remedios, a street before Nakpil which is where I was going to get off, so I though what the hell I'll get off too and if we end up walking in the same direction then great something might happen. But no. He went in the other direction so whatever I went on my way to Nakpil.
Just before I got to Nakpil, someone grabbed my arm. I didn't think anything of it, and at first I thought it was Tom (my friend and co-organizer of G4M's Next Top Model), cuz only someone you know would grab your arm right. But no. I was being mugged. Soon the guy had his left hand over my mouth and his right hand had a knife which he was holding close to my chest. He asked for my phone and I gave it right away cuz hell I never really liked that phone anyway. He also asked for my cash, and I gave him the 40 pesos that was in my left pocket. Of course I had way more than that, but the rest of my money was in my socks and he didn't press the issue cuz I guess he saw how crap my phone was and assumed I really was poor. After I gave him the cash he let go of me and told me to run. And I did.
I probably should have been more traumatized than I was, and I have to admit that in the moment the knife and his voice freaked me out a bit, but a few minutes after he let go of me my first reaction was to smirk and laugh a bit. Like I said, my phone was crap and he just gave me an excuse to buy a new one. All he got was 40 pesos, and he didn't even ask for more. In way, he didn't really get much from me, and except for the scratch from where the knife pressed into my chest, I escaped with very little being taken from me. I was lucky. And I wasn't going to let that small hiccup ruin what was going to be a fabulous night.
So when I got to Malate I looked for Tom and my other G4M-NTM friends. I couldn't see where they were right away, so I ordered a beer and stayed outside Chelu for a bit. When I went back inside I finally saw Mother Domeng, KC and Chris and hung out with them for a while. Domeng and I are similar in the sense that we go to Malate not really to pick men up, but really more than anything to dance. If men pick us up then fine, but if not so what cuz all we really wanted to do was dance anyway.
Of course, having said that, dancing in a bar in Malate means that inevitably you'll be rubbing body parts with hot strangers, and that's what happened to me. I was just minding my own business, dancing like I was the only one there on the floor, when in comes in this hot manly man with huge muscles a tight tshirt and an i'm-tired-i-just-wanna-go-home-and-fuck-some-pretty-young-thing look on his face. He stood at the bar right next to where I was. At first we were both looking in other directions, pretending not to see each other checking each other out. Then it became more difficult to ignore each other because there were more people going into the bar than there were going out, and in no time the crowd was pressing us into each other.
At first I was still like ok whatever you're hot but I'm here to dance so even if we were touching already I was still dancing and grooving to the music. But then he looked me in the eye, smiled, and scratched my tummy. Of course I smiled back. I moved next to him and we held hands. I swear, even at the first touch I was already feeling really loose and limp cuz he was so fucking hot. His hands were warm, a little rough, and huge. I asked him what his name was. He said it was Deo. I said hi I'm Josef. I can't remember what we talked about after, but I do remember that I started dancing again, and while I was dancing he started massaging my lower back with his fingers. I swear, if he wanted me right then and there I was going to give in. But for whatever reason a few minutes later he left the bar and didn't come back.
OK fine. Call me slow. Even though I kinda knew that that was my signal to leave the bar with him so we could fuck the night away in some god-forsaken motel, he never explicitly said he wanted me to go with him, and I didn't want to assume anything. Also, I was with Domeng, and I didn't want to leave him abruptly. So I stayed in the bar and danced, which is what I was having fun doing anyway. Naturally I spent the rest of the night thinking what the fuck I'm such an idiot I should have just left with him and gotten laid. I saw him outside the bar a few hours later but it seemed he had already picked someone else up. Fuck.
Oh well. The rest of the night I was so high on his touch, the lights, the music, and the cigarette smoke that my head was feeling really light. I still had a great time though. I hope Deo is still around when I get back to Malate this Saturday. If not him then some other hot man.
So that was it for Saturday. The only other thing I did was meet up with some people from G4M's Next Top Model, but the meeting didn't last long. Plus I'm not part of G4M-NTM anymore, though that's an entirely different story. On Sunday I bought a new phone, set a new date with Sean, and masturbated to the memory of Deo's touch.
Until next time.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Murder She Dreamt
For the past two nights, my dreams have been about murders. I'm not sure exactly what that means, but I'll look it up on the net when I get to the office.
Two nights ago, I had a dream that I was a clairvoyant, and I was telling this mother that her son died because of a hate crime. He was white, and was involved in a porno ring that exploited black women. All I can remember now is that while I was walking up the stairs I saw images of and orgy of black women being fucked by white men while they were being videotaped.
Last night I had another dream about murder, but this time there were a lot more people murdered. There was a serial killer who going around this office (or whatever that building was) and he was mutilating the people I knew. An investigation was ongoing, and I vaguely remember writing notes of what I remembered or what I had envisioned in a black notebook. At one point I was also walking up the stairs.
The weird thing is that in both of my dreams I was some kind of psychic who could see the murders as they had happened. I could also see the ghosts of the people who had been murdered, and in fact some of them were even talking to me.
Hmmm. I hope the dreams were a positive sign of something. I know that climbing up stairs is a positive sign of advancement. I'm not sure what murder and clairvoyancy means though.
Two nights ago, I had a dream that I was a clairvoyant, and I was telling this mother that her son died because of a hate crime. He was white, and was involved in a porno ring that exploited black women. All I can remember now is that while I was walking up the stairs I saw images of and orgy of black women being fucked by white men while they were being videotaped.
Last night I had another dream about murder, but this time there were a lot more people murdered. There was a serial killer who going around this office (or whatever that building was) and he was mutilating the people I knew. An investigation was ongoing, and I vaguely remember writing notes of what I remembered or what I had envisioned in a black notebook. At one point I was also walking up the stairs.
The weird thing is that in both of my dreams I was some kind of psychic who could see the murders as they had happened. I could also see the ghosts of the people who had been murdered, and in fact some of them were even talking to me.
Hmmm. I hope the dreams were a positive sign of something. I know that climbing up stairs is a positive sign of advancement. I'm not sure what murder and clairvoyancy means though.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Ugly-Beautiful
I met someone really really sweet last Friday. His name was Deejay. He messaged me on G4M, and asked if I was free to meet that night. I wasn't sure if he was my type based on the pic in his profile, but I thought what the hell might as well meet him anyway. And so I agreed to meet him later that evening in Guadalupe.
I think I need to back-track a bit and explain that I was feeling in a really good mood that day. I double-shifted the night before, so by Friday afternoon I was done with work for the week. I dunno if it was because of lack of sleep, but while walking on the street going to my house, I noticed the street was extra shiny. It was like little bits of glass were in the asphalt, and the effect was that with every step I took it was like I was walking on rainbows. It was very pretty, in an ugly-beautiful kinda way. It was a great start to the day.
When I got to Guadalupe, after my long nap, I waited for a while at Jollibee before Deejay arrived. While waiting, I saw Bon, the first guy I ever met through chat. He was a really nice guy, although I was pretty sure he wouldn't remember me, even though he worked at PeopleSupport for a bit. I didn't say hi, but all the same I took that as another positive sign.
So Deejay arrived after around an hour. He turned out to be cuter than his pic, which is rare. We had to take a jeep to his place, and he paid, which is also rare. We chatted for a bit, but were mostly quiet during the trip. He had his arm over one of my legs, and that felt nice.
When we got to his house, it turned out that his aunt had just arrived, so we couldn't go in just yet. We had to go sit somewhere for a while, and that's where we got to know each other a little bit. I have to admit, I don't normally like getting to know my hook-ups, cuz if I find out more about them I inevitably begin falling for them, and I didn't want to fall for anyone just yet. But all the same we talked.
Sob stories are my biggest turn on. Ever since Rolly took me to Manila Bay to tell me about his family and what he wanted to accomplish for them, I've fallen easily for men who've had to go through so much. Vince was an orphan with lots going against him. And this time, Deejay had his own drama as well.
Deejay was an orphan too. He was an illegitimate child, and didn't get to see his Dad that often because his Dad was with his first family. His Mom had died when he was 4 years old, and ever since he had lived with his Mom's family. For some reason though, while he was telling the story he didn't seem all that sad anymore, so I was safe. Sob story, yes; falling for the drama, no.
As far as relationships were concerned, he had also just broken up, and also around the same time that Vince and I broke up. His longest relationship was one that lasted 4 months, although it was really a 2-month relationship cuz for the last 2 months he barely saw the guy he was with at the time. That wasn't a good sign, but I didn't care. I wasn't looking for a relationship anyway.
After around half an hour, we went back to his place and his aunt was asleep. We went to the back of the house and I started to blow him. I know this is bad, but I have to say that he had the weirdest penis I had ever had sex with. It was thick, but even though it was hard it still looked flaccid. It wouldn't go up. It was permanently down, and it was bent. He was also the hairiest guy I've ever had sex with, and it was weird having to dig down beneath hair just to find his nipple.
Still, he seemed nice, so I thought whatever I'll just get this over with. And then he started stroking my cheeks while I was blowing him. While he was looking down at me, I swear he had a loving kind of look. I thought that it was sweet of him to do that, and the only other guy who's done that for me is Vince. The sweetest thing though was that after we were done having sex, we spent like half an hour just kissing and hugging. I missed being able to just cuddle. It was so sweet that I'm not kidding, I almost cried while we were making out.
So there. Even though he had a weird penis, I still thought that was the best sex I had in a long, long time. We're planning to see each other again sometime this week. I know it's not going to progress into a relationship, but for now it'll have to do. At least someone is making me happy again.
I think I need to back-track a bit and explain that I was feeling in a really good mood that day. I double-shifted the night before, so by Friday afternoon I was done with work for the week. I dunno if it was because of lack of sleep, but while walking on the street going to my house, I noticed the street was extra shiny. It was like little bits of glass were in the asphalt, and the effect was that with every step I took it was like I was walking on rainbows. It was very pretty, in an ugly-beautiful kinda way. It was a great start to the day.
When I got to Guadalupe, after my long nap, I waited for a while at Jollibee before Deejay arrived. While waiting, I saw Bon, the first guy I ever met through chat. He was a really nice guy, although I was pretty sure he wouldn't remember me, even though he worked at PeopleSupport for a bit. I didn't say hi, but all the same I took that as another positive sign.
So Deejay arrived after around an hour. He turned out to be cuter than his pic, which is rare. We had to take a jeep to his place, and he paid, which is also rare. We chatted for a bit, but were mostly quiet during the trip. He had his arm over one of my legs, and that felt nice.
When we got to his house, it turned out that his aunt had just arrived, so we couldn't go in just yet. We had to go sit somewhere for a while, and that's where we got to know each other a little bit. I have to admit, I don't normally like getting to know my hook-ups, cuz if I find out more about them I inevitably begin falling for them, and I didn't want to fall for anyone just yet. But all the same we talked.
Sob stories are my biggest turn on. Ever since Rolly took me to Manila Bay to tell me about his family and what he wanted to accomplish for them, I've fallen easily for men who've had to go through so much. Vince was an orphan with lots going against him. And this time, Deejay had his own drama as well.
Deejay was an orphan too. He was an illegitimate child, and didn't get to see his Dad that often because his Dad was with his first family. His Mom had died when he was 4 years old, and ever since he had lived with his Mom's family. For some reason though, while he was telling the story he didn't seem all that sad anymore, so I was safe. Sob story, yes; falling for the drama, no.
As far as relationships were concerned, he had also just broken up, and also around the same time that Vince and I broke up. His longest relationship was one that lasted 4 months, although it was really a 2-month relationship cuz for the last 2 months he barely saw the guy he was with at the time. That wasn't a good sign, but I didn't care. I wasn't looking for a relationship anyway.
After around half an hour, we went back to his place and his aunt was asleep. We went to the back of the house and I started to blow him. I know this is bad, but I have to say that he had the weirdest penis I had ever had sex with. It was thick, but even though it was hard it still looked flaccid. It wouldn't go up. It was permanently down, and it was bent. He was also the hairiest guy I've ever had sex with, and it was weird having to dig down beneath hair just to find his nipple.
Still, he seemed nice, so I thought whatever I'll just get this over with. And then he started stroking my cheeks while I was blowing him. While he was looking down at me, I swear he had a loving kind of look. I thought that it was sweet of him to do that, and the only other guy who's done that for me is Vince. The sweetest thing though was that after we were done having sex, we spent like half an hour just kissing and hugging. I missed being able to just cuddle. It was so sweet that I'm not kidding, I almost cried while we were making out.
So there. Even though he had a weird penis, I still thought that was the best sex I had in a long, long time. We're planning to see each other again sometime this week. I know it's not going to progress into a relationship, but for now it'll have to do. At least someone is making me happy again.
