Habemus Papam

A new pontiff has been elected to succeed Pope John Paul II -- Pope Benedict XVI; formerly Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger. The new Pope is apparently ultra-conservative, and has spoken out against homosexuality and inter-faith dialogue in the past. Yes, he may eventually turn out to be a great leader, but all the same I think my Catholic renewal ends here.

I stopped being Catholic almost a decade ago. I was at one point a devout Catholic; going to mass every Sunday, reading the Bible when I had nothing else to do, confessing my sins, etc. But some things I could never really understand, like the concept of homosexuality being unnatural when it felt completely natural to me, God not being able to control Satan, etc. I completely gave up trying to reconcile my beliefs with Catholic beliefs after having read "Conversations With God". I might write more about that book later. I'm happier without organized religion. I don't really talk about it much though, cuz inevitably talking about my beliefs leads me to having to defend them, which I find tiring and ultimately pointless. It's not what you believe but how what you believe shapes who you are and what you do. Plus it's not like I go around telling people what they believe is wrong, so I appreciate people who show me the same respect.

Though I may not consider myself Catholic, I was still saddened by Pope John Paul II's death. I didn't expect his death to affect me as much as it did. Inspite of the differences in our beliefs, I honestly thought he was a great person who worked harder for peace than most other world leaders. The only world figure I respected more was Mother Teresa, who's death in 1997 also saddened me. I appreciated the lengths he took to reach out to the people of the world by travelling as often as he could, and I like how hard he tried to reach out to the leaders of other faiths. OK fine, he was very conservative, and his views on homosexuality were disappointing, but I'm very Japanese in the sense that once someone dies I tend to only remember only the positive things about them -- especially when the positive far outweighs the negative.

I watched the Pope John Paul II's funeral at the office, and I swear I looked like such a devoted Catholic. I was only person who stayed in front of the TV from start to finish, and everyone who came by didn't even bother to try and change the channel cuz I was obviously so fixated. The ceremony itself was your average Catholic mass, but I was particularly moved by the part when the world leaders were all wishing each other peace.

After the ceremony, as with everyone else in the world, I was excited about who they'd elect as the next Pope. I hoped the person would be from either Latin America or Africa. I'm not sure why I cared, considering how much I previously tried to distance myself from Catholicism. I think it's partly because I wanted to feel connected to this historical event. I guess you could say I decided to temporarily become Catholic again -- just until the new Pope was elected.

I knew though that whoever they selected would be conservative and non-progressive, but I didn't mind. For some reason I agree with the people who say that Catholicism shouldn't change its stand on certain issues just for the sake of keeping or gaining followers. Its being dogmatic is what makes Catholicism Catholic. If you don't agree with what they say, then just don't be Catholic. Yeah fine, a lot of their beliefs seem archaic, antiquated, and non-responsive to current issues, but whatever. To each his own.

True enough, the conservative and non-progressive Ratzinger was elected Pope. Whether or not he stays conservative and non-progressive remains to be seen. I'm sure he will do a good job as Pope of the Catholics; maybe not in terms of what progressive Catholics hope he will do, but definitely in terms of what he is supposed to do according to tradition. As far as I'm concerned though, I still do not believe in Catholic doctrine, and I still think I'd be happier without a religion. I will now go back to being a heretic. Urbi et Orbi.